Choice of a life time...

How long does it take to know a person?
A lifetime of course.
And you are expected to answer the question “Do you like him” from the five minute meeting you had.
A person, who you had no idea, that he existed on earth before these five minutes.
A person, who you don’t know, if he prefers you taking the lead in the conversation.
A person, who you don’t know if he likes talking about cricket.
A person who you don’t know if he enjoys the wind at the sunset on a beach.
A person who you don’t know if he enjoys munching the peanuts as you take the long walk.
A person who you don’t know if he likes coffee or tea.
A person who you don’t know if he appreciates that you are an individual with equal emotions, ambitions and challenges.

And you are supposed to decide whether you would like to spend the rest of your life with him in those five minutes.
You are supposed to select a life time companion for you in those five minutes, when all your life you believed companionships just happen and are not made.
You are supposed to believe that you have chosen your soulmate…who reads every single thought of yours, when you don’t even know if the person who sits in front of you enjoys reading Ruskin Bond or Ayn Ryand!


And I am surprised by the fact; most of the people I have known in my life have made the right decision in those five minutes or even less.
Life is indeed beyond our reign and control!

Money...

If I had a ten rupee note, I could have a coffee with a friend…but then it wouldn’t be enough for a tropical ice berg.
If I had a hundred rupee note I could buy a meal for 4 starving street kids. But then, the number of such starving stomachs always exceeds the number of 100 rupee note you could get.
If I had 45,000 rupees I could buy a laptop…but then, I would still need another 45k for a good one.
If I had 1 lakh rupees, I could save a kidney patient from death..but the number of kidney patients exceeds lakhs…
If I had 3 lakh rupees, I could live happily….but then I read today, it wouldn’t be enough to spend one night in the most luxurious hotel in Mumbai.
Money is never enough…be it for necessity…or for luxury…

എന്നോ ഒരു അവധിക്കാലം.

വേനലവധി തുടങ്ങുബോഴേക്കും റബറ്ത്തോട്ടം മുഴുവന് ഒരു കരിയിലക്കാടായിട്ടുഡാകും.ആ തോട്ടത്തിലാണ് കുട്ടികള് പകലന്തിയോളം കളിക്കുക.തെക്കേ പറമ്ബു നിറയേ കശുമാവുകളാണ്. അടുത്തു തന്നെയാണു തൊഴുത്തും കച്ചിത്തുറുവും. തോട്ടത്തിലേ റബറ്ക്കായ്കള് പെറുക്കിയും അരുകിലെ ജാതിമരം കൈയേറിയും പല കളികളില് മുഴുകി സന്ധ്യ മയങ്ങുന്നതറിയാറില്ല. കിണട്ടുക്കരയില് വെള്ളം കോരി മേലു കഴുകുമ്ബൊള് ഇരുളു വീണ റബറ്ത്തോട്ടത്തിലെക്കു വെറുതേ നോട്ടം പായും. കരിയിലക്കിടയില് അനങ്ങുന്നതു മൂറ്ഖന്നാകുമോ എന്നു.


മിക്കപ്പോഴും അത്താഴം എടുക്കുബൊഴെക്കും ബള്ബ് മിന്നി മിന്നി അണഞ്ഞിട്ടുന്ഠാകും. മെഴുകുതിരി വെട്ടത്തില് ഈച്ചകളെ പായിച്ചും ഒരോ ഉരുള ചോറു കാലിലുരുമിയിരിക്കുന്ന കുറിഞ്ഞിപൂച്ചക്കു പങ്കുവെച്ചും അത്താഴം തീറ്ക്കുമ്ബോഴെക്കും മഴയും തുടങ്ങിയിരിക്കും.


ദൂരെ എവിടെയോ മാക്കാച്ചികളും ചീവീടുകളും ചിലച്ചു തുടങ്ങുമ്ബോള് കുട്ടികളൊക്കെയും മെത്തയില് സ്ഥാനം പിടിച്ചിരിക്കുന്നു. സുഖകരമായ ഉറക്കത്തിലേക്കു വഴുതുമ്ബൊള് കണ്ട സ്വപ്നങ്ങളൊക്കെയും ഇന്നുകളെ കുറിച്ചായിരുന്നു.


ആന്നും ഇന്നും ആകാശത്തിലെ നക്ഷത്രങ്ങളെ നോക്കി പുജ്ഞിരിയോടെ ഓറ്ക്കുന്ന 2

വരികളുണ്ടു


......നീലാകാശം പീലിവിടറ്ത്തി ....പച്ച പനയോല............

Indian pizzaa...

We were at the restaurant to have the first meal of the day.
I don’t remember a single day back home, when I missed a meal of the day, be it breakfast, lunch, dinner or even evening tea.
And here we were, grooving ourselves into the metro culture, skipping breakfast and lunch on a holiday to have a posh dinner.


“Mamma…I want pizza”
“No da…there is no pizza in this hotel, we will have something else..”
The little boy was getting restless at the next table.
“No mamma..I want only pizzaa…”
“Ask this waiter also, there is no pizzaa…”
The waiter smiled and replied…
“Pizzaa only in pizza hut…we will give you something which tastes exactly the same….that is called cheese naan”
“Yes da…we will have cheese naan”
“but mummy, pizzaaa…?”
“This taste exactly like pizzaa da….we will have cheese naan”


That’s when my phone rang. Call from home.
“Yes mummy, I had breakfast and lunch. And now, we are having dinner outside.”


What a world is this! Where everyone lied to their loved ones!

The little boy was still waiting for this cheese naan when we left the restaurant.
I hope he approves that cheese naan do resemble pizza in taste.

Beauty...

Lipsticks are nice to see on beautiful girls. Lipsticks are nice to see in ads.
But to feel yourself choked in your workplace from morning to evening with the pungent smell of lipstick is not so good to feel about.

Ethnic day it was called at office. People given the liberty to express themselves??
May be yes. That’s why may be, the girls never let their lipstick lose its shine from morning to evening.
Beauty doesn’t come easy…they were right!
It must be a painful task to pursue it. Yes, you need to pursue it. It doesn’t come and stay for ever!

So, why am I feeling so apprehensive about it? :):)
My life taught me a lot of lessons that may be, made me a better person.
One lesson that it never taught me and I still fail to learn could be that being a geek may be a cool thing. But they are not entertained among girls except if not accompanied by a charm –of whatever means! :):)

A blissful life!

They say, to see Taj Mahal is a bliss in itself.
I haven’t seen the Taj Mahal. But I sure know what bliss is.
Some moments in your life, those little things that make you feel good…I have experienced them. Not one, but many…and still do have. Sure,mine, like each one of the others, is a blissful life!

It was just a dream!
From the times I can remember, one recurring dream of mine has been falling from a great height. Haven’t seen them of late, but all my childhood has been troubled by this one dream. And just when you fall through the never ending height and just when you hit the ground, you open the eyes. The relief that it was just a dream, and I am still alive in all senses is one of most blissful moments I have ever come across.

I have another hour to go!
One of those cozy cold rainy mornings, when you ought to get up early to get ready to school or office. And you wake up some time in the early hours of dawn, only because the blanket has just slid by and the cold wind tickled your leg. You can still hear the rain outside, the darkness slowly giving way to daylight, “suprabhatham” being played in some temple near by, and you look at the clock to realize you can sleep for another hour more! Heaven couldn’t be a better place. You gather yourself under the blanket, and cuddle yourself like a kitten, hoping, the dream that was broken can be continued. Pure bliss!

Hi there?
Some days, you just feel lonely. For no reason. And you start searching for company. Friends near you may not help, family may not help. As you keep hopping from browsers to browsers, and check your email for the tenth time for some emails that were never sent but hoped to be received, a messenger window pops up “Hi there?”…You cannot resist a smile, a smile from the heart…and a thankyou note,just said in the mind…

Is the fever still on?
Yes, you are feeling terrible ill. You are missing school and you see that stupid dream of someone chasing you, again. Suddenly you feel the warmth of a strong palm on your forehead. Its Pappa, checking if the temperature is still high. You feel the weight of that strong palm against your weak body. You have never told him how secure, how comfortable you felt on that one warm touch that drove away your fears. But you treasure it as one of the blissful moments of your life.

Two pieces of bread and a smile...
What does it cost to have a moment of bliss?
Two pieces of bread and a smile!
That’s what Babu taught me. Babu may not be his real name.
But that’s what the Ashram people called the old insane man who was found in the street, among the stray dogs fighting in the garbage bin.
“You are such a sweet person. I will ask my son to marry you. He is a big engineer, earning 1 lakh rupees . Will you give me bread everyday?”
That’s what he told me as we gave the bread to the Ashram officials. He may or may not have a son , he may or may not mean what he says, but the tear that shined in his eyes, as he held my hand…I will remember him for a life time.


There may be another million blissful moments, yet to be shared. But here I stop.
Many times, I have felt my life is a mess. But then, each day, life offers so many of these blissful moments, that you are helpless but live on...
This is not a tag, but anyone(if at all anyone!!!) reading this, could take it on...
After all, isn't this what the very short life of ours is all about!

An hour -long time back -Part 1

How long does it take to define one's destiny? An hour may be?


Aug 7th 2004. I remember the taste of vada that Pappa brought for me at the Kottayam railway station as we were waiting for the Island express. My first overnight journey!
Was I thrilled at that "night train journey dream" come true or proud that I was going for my first job or still reflecting back the tears seen in Mamma's and my sister's eyes? I still don't know. Many more jobs may come and go, but Aug 9th 2004 will always remain my first day in my first job!

So, how long does it take to define one's destiny? may be even less than an hour?

1998, when we took those much awaited breaks during study hours in school, we always discussed what each one of us would become in life. Dimple was to become a business consultant for sure, Dane a doctor, Babi a teacher. Choices were tough for Jam and myself :). And how confidently I declared
"No way! I can't even imagine working with machines day in and day out. Machines that don't understand your emotions, machines that cannot respond to your emotions. And you work your whole day so that some million dollar company can become a billion dollar company? What do we do for the society!?Not me,an engineer, for sure!" I can smile at that now.

So, how long does it take to define one's destiny? may be even less than an hour?


Me : I don't want to join Science group
They: Lets take Science, you always have options after 12th.

Me: I am not sure if I want to write the entrance.
They : We will buy the application form, what if you feel like writing later.

Me: No, I am not going to entrance today
They : Just write, its a matter of 2 hours, lets decide later, whether you go for it or not.

And that less than half an hour introspection that made me "just attempt" a single exam dictated my life for next seven years, and may be many more years ahead? Unbelievingly true!!

Yes, the ride of seven years...and the life time of memories that go along. Bitter or sweet, I wouldn't classify them. But they are here to stay!
No, I am not going to look back and see if I chose the right path. If I were to be taken back in time and given that half an hour to make the decision once again, I don't know if I would choose to skip that exam and I don't know if I am happy to be where I am right now. I just know, even when the "self help gurus" say "You make your destiny", life always offers us the strangest of the ironies, toughest of the choices, and the most unplanned destinies. And all you could and ought to do is...live them!